As my readers well know, sexism
is a very important issue in gaming. After all, if we make strong, non-stereotypical
female characters… I didn’t figure out the rest of that sentence but that’s not
what matters! What matters here is that I have found a game worthy of the
required sexism we need in games. Because it features attractive women! And as
we all know it’s sexist to have attractive women in games because women aren’t
intended to be attractive! So come along and let me show you some of the
wonders Skullgirls has to offer!
Oh right gameplay I should get
that useless bit out the way. It’s a fighting game made by people who actually
have a passion for fighting games and they’re all enjoyable people. And stuff.
I don’t really care all these games are the same to me. Let’s get to my
favorite ladies!
All images below are provided by the Skullgirls Digital Art compendium, courtesy of your truly donating to their lovely Indiegogo campaign!
Fire we have Valentine, who is of
course the required sexy nurse! Oh just look at her one eye and her obvious
cleavage. Much unlike the character Painwheel, who seems to be some overly
edged horror. Honestly don’t even know why they designed her like that. It’s
almost as if they were thinking of creating a character for the sake of being a
character and not just solely for fan-service. Can’t imagine who would like
her. I mean yeah I guess the whole tragic back-story experimentation thing can
garner pity support. And apparently her character was a really nice person
prior to the experimentation. But who cares onto the next character!
Right here we have the lovely
Filia. Much better than the character Double. Who the hell gave permission to
put an eldritch abomination in my fanservice game? It’s like they didn’t even
try with her. I’m keeping your eyes safe from such horrible things. Let’s hope
you never have to see someone playing her online. I swear, such characters make
no sense here. What, you wanted to make an evil minion of vile gods and not
make her super-hot in her normal form? What’s wrong with these people? I
thought this was a game serious about its fanservice?
And now we come to Squigly. A
much better undead member than Ms. Fortune. How do you mess up the catgirl
model so massively? She’s just supposed to be tied to a male character that doesn’t
want her, make all of her statements followed by meow or niya, and give her no
personality whatsoever. Instead you give her puns, gruesome bloody physical
fighting style, and independence from most male authority figures. I don’t
understand how someone can screw up such a perfect model!
Not like any girls I mentioned
are any better. Last survivor of an elite core and genius in medicine, amnesiac
with a past most likely covered in some blood, and a zombie who suffered
horrible atrocities at the hands of mobsters? It’s almost as if they’re trying
to create an actual plot. That’s the worst thing a game built solely on fan
service can do! Still, you should enjoy Skullgirls, because clearly all of its
characters are there purely for sexual gratification, because some of them are
attractive.
Skullgirls gets a badonk out of
donk.
Ah, well that’s done, now which pictures
did I…
DO NOT PUBLISH THIS I MESSED UP
BIG TIME!
No comments:
Post a Comment